Want your book reviewed by a cranky, underpaid, sexually frustrated blogger? Read below:
1) Genres: Accepted: YA, Dystopia, Male/Male, Romance, Erotica, Apocalyptic, Fantasy, Urban Fantasy, or any variation and combination of the listed.
Not accepted: Religious, memoirs, non-fiction, humor. Also, no water spots, sex with children under 18, or vampires. I hate vampires. They’re like undead leeches. Gross.
2) Self Published Books: I will review self-published novels, as long as they fit in the above genres. I do have a medical condition where I break out in hives at the words “indie published”. Be cool. Don’t make today an itchy day.
3) Please use the ‘contact me’ form to send a short (two or three paragraphs summary, or back of book blurb) of your novel. Include the title, your pen-name, and contact email address. Do not include any links back to the book. My spam filter may block it. If I’m interested in reading, I’ll contact you.
4) To prove you’ve read through this list, please place “Jeremiah was a bullfrog” in the subject field. Any review request without the correct subject will be deleted.
5) I don’t do quid pro quo, either. Thanks for asking.
6) Not only does my car habitually smell like dog, but I’m kind of a book snob. So I won’t like everything I read. If I think your book merits 1 or 2 stars, I’m not going to post the review on this blog. Life is too short to spend time on things I don’t like. Sorry. (Just kidding. I’m not really sorry.)
7) 3 stars out of 5 means I liked your book. Really.
All good? Spend two minutes on a blurb that’ll warm the cockles of my black heart, and then submit here.